Love continues cz...

Few years ago, in November, i lost someone so dear forever.

This November, you left me forever.

Next November, i guess i'm going to leave this world forever.

Again.

Single.

Some happiness left as yet...

Didn't know there's still people who reads this blog. Hmm...

Anyways, I was so afraid that my darling baby Nadia will be withdrawing as well with my dear Hesper.
Each time she is not in school, I get so anxious.
Hesper is leaving, one source of happiness is leaving me.
Don't want Nadia to leave me as well.

Besides these children, I don't see the reason to smile every single day.

I find this really meaningful:

"You don't love her. You just didn't want to be alone. Or maybe, she was just good for your ego. Or, maybe she made you feel better about your miserable life, but you didn't love her. Because you don't destroy people you love."

Still, it is definitely not wrong for her to fall so deeply in love.

What the heart says...

The only mistake I made was to fell in love with you.

Secretly, I cried because you gave me so much sorrow.

You ignorant, wicked one who inflict every tyranny on me.

My love for you will never lessen.

& I swear it on the tears I shed for you.

For I have truly loved you.

& will always continue to love only you.

Too numb.

I think I should be there.

Yusliza, wake up!
He's just not that into you.
Disappointments after disappointments.
& that's when tears dried up on its own.
Still hanging on strongly though to hope and faith.

Those words.

Yes, i sleep like a pig just so i wouldn't trouble you with my never ending problems.

Yes, i sleep like a pig just so i get back the peace of my heart.

Yes, i sleep like a pig to get rid of the loneliness i feel with or without you.

Yes, i have to sleep like a pig because i choose to keep on loving you come what may and through my dreams, i see our beautiful future.

If i don't even have the right to do this, i shall take my leave just so you will stay happy forever and always because it matters to me.

It doesn't make any difference as i will keep on loving with or without you.

The only difference is, i'm not fortunate to have you as my own and for you to own me as a part of you.

These words comes from the heart and it has not been quoted by any hindi movies that i simply love to watch all the time.

Yesterday was neither a threat nor a test. It was actually a heavy decision which I should have made long ago but i was just too weak back then. I still am now but i told myself to stay strong for you, you and only you. For your happiness which you can never get from me.

I still prefer to blog even now because I am sure noone listens. Even if they do, they just wouldn't understand. I thank god, i still have this means to run away from being too depressed with reality for a while.

I'm just so shattered.