My Heart - Acha Septriasa & Irwansyah

Suddenly i love this song. Idris was the one who introduce me to this movie. I didn't even know the existence of this movie and he said the movie is highly recommended. It's a sad story and he says i will definately cry. Hahaz... ok. One problem with me. I don't really cry watching sad story but instead i cry watching HORROR movie. OKay, Nurul and Candy if you are reading this. Shhh... don't need to tell what happened when we went to watched 'CREEP'. Crap! LOL! So okay... its been a long time since i watched movies. Or rather, its been a long time since i went out of the house to some window shopping or whatever. I haven't even stepped the Bazaar Ramadhan. Gees... don't really have the mood to go out either. So been home for quite some time already. So i like read at somebody's blog ehh that he want to watch My Heart!! His name is like ELIAS like that. Or rather, Sky/Langit? Hahaz... And also Kyn. Her name also like Ashikin like that. Hahahahaz... Come humans! Let's go watch then see if i cry or not after the movie. Hahaz...

Not going to blog much today just that i need to say something today. Yes, here in my blog. Okay, i never did such a thing in my blog before but owh well, i'm going to do it here.

To a special someone, a friend and you know who you are.

Phew, took me lots of courage to do this.
I'm not really used to saying all this.
So well, just shut up and listen up.
I have so many things to say to you.
But i shall just keep it short and sweet!

Okay, so i have been doing a lot of thinking this few days.
Only to come to a conclusion that, i'm not being understanding at all and that, i'm kindda sellfish..
I'm sorry for being harsh to you that night in MSN.
I'm sorry to have not at least try to understand how you actually feel.

I know you are going through hard times now, and that only God knows how you feel.
I'm sorry that i flare at you when you were actually just sharing with me what you are actually feeling.
Seriously, i've been doing a lot of thinking, a lot, and that i'm beginning to feel guilty.
Guilty because i can't bring myself to tell you that firstly, i miss you and that i want you to be strong and take care of yourself everyday and always.

I don't know why i can't bring myself to tell you this:
Although we don't get to see each other everyday,
Although we don't get to talk to each other everyday,
Although we don't get to msg each other everyday,
i just want you to know that,
My feelings for you remain and that even if i'm not special to you,
you are still my special friend whom i will miss and care for every single minute, hour, day and ALWAYS.

I get so frustrated at times thinking about everything.
But deep down in my heart i want you to be at peace,
i want you to be happy and most importantly i want you to have no worries despite of all problems that you are facing.
Though it seems impossible, i still pray for the impossible to happen.

How i wish every single minute when you are down i'm there with you.
I know you have the most important priorities now.
I'm sorry i'm not useful enough because i couldn't do much to help you.
I'm so sorry about that.

But one thing i'm very sure.
I'll always be there for you whenever you need me.
I will always give you my support.
AlWAYS!
You gotta trust me on that because from chapter one, i'm beginning to trust you all over again.

Lastly, i'll pray that everything will be fine.
Will be back to normal and that i will get to see you smile again.
Have faith and you will see the rough edges of live getting smoother as days passed.
You should know i am never good at words and expressing my thoughts.
So i'm trying my best now to say what i'm actually feeling.
I'm sorry if you hate it.
I'm sorry if you dislike it.
Whatever it is, i miss you.

OK! Phew, done. I hope the person whom i'm referring now understands how i feel and accept my apology. I just miss this friend a lot a lot a lot. I don't know how else to tell this person so i hope that person will read my blgo and yea of course read that part. Don't ask me who because heh heh, like i will say who. Ish, only God knows la how i miss this person! DUSH!
So enough already. Hahaz... alhumdulilah its already the third day of the beuatiful month of Ramadhan. Hope i will be as strong and healthy to complete it and then meet the month of Syawal. Insya'allah. OMG! Its my first time watching Maggi and Me! Hahaz... its kindda funny actually and Fiona Xie is definately a babe. Love her! Pretty and cute! Ok, replies to taggies:

dear miera: Ya lah ya lah, not me and my sour pimple right? *sobx* Hahaz... takper2 i majok with you at MSN already! =)

dear ads: You too ads! :-)

dear rinny: Hey thanks for visiting!

dear nana: Hahaz... ish mau sih diajarin. Kamu mau saya ajarin boyan egak? Wahahahahaha!!! =)

dear EHHREN: Eyy hugs you best friend!! Twees! =)

dear faezah: HEY!! Haloo girl!! Long time no hear from you! Twees!

dear nasri: Oii, i know how to take care of myself ok. See now ok already what! DUSH! Anyhow say only. Hahaz.. ya lah you never visit me, you visitiing my neighbour for the BEREKAI kan? Pongkai!! Hahahaz!!! All the best for exams!

dear LiN: Eyy Lin! Ya lah our HADY won!! We love him soooo blooody much!! Hur hur. =)

Hahahaz.... was like screaming with best friend and Lin after Gurmit says HADY MIRZA yesterday! Hahahaz... super happy la Hady won!! Woo hoo!!! I LOVE HADY!!! =)

the end.

Selamat Berpuaser buat semua umat islam di dunia ini.

Alhumdulilah, i'm still alive to do what i am suppose to do as a muslim. Though i'm like practically sick, i don't find it hard to fast at all. So i'm fasting! Woo hoo. Okay so i'm still sick. My voice still sound so bad. To people who called me like HakimBesi, Haifa Noorin, Lin and more. They will know how bad my voice sounds. Well i thought it was okay to not see the doctor that Thursday because i thought my cough will stop after some rest but it got worst at night and so before all clinics closed my brother rushed me to the nearest clinic becuase my private clinic was already closed by then.

Well Friday was hell a fun day. Minus the coughing of course. I couldn't get to sleep the whole of Thursday night because i was coughing non-stop. Cough so badly that i couldn't even breathe properly. Wake mama up and she gave me some medicine and i only get to sleep at around 5 and at 7 i have to wake up for HI Club Instructor course. I was so exhausted and sleepy that i don't feel like going. But Lin and Khai were already getting ready to go to school so i felt bad not going. Dragged myself to bath and get ready to school. And yea it was some sort fun + broing ah the course that we decided to just leave. So we left to Far East to have lunch at Sakura. Heh heh... thanks to my lovely driver that day. Who else if its not my lovely BROTHER. He practically take us from Ngee Ann then to Far East and then to Marina... Hahaz... and we slacked at esplanade. Took some pictures and i HATE the picture of me so bad because of that one STUPID pimple!!! So freaking big la! Its like the biggest in my 18 years of life!

Okay saw the awful pimple. I couldn't care less about my face that day because i was already sick and so ya i already like a sick person. Lazy to wear make-up and all. So can't be bothered la. At least i got to crap so much with Lin. This is the best part!! Hahaz... So Khai have to leave home early and so left me and Lin. So a mixture of Lin and Me can cause a bomb. We actually went to the Specialist Shopping Centre John Little to find Arif but i think we forgot to look for him because we saw TOYS!! Hahaz... so Lin and me was being super crazy! Lin played with the Superman head and seriously it was embarrasing because there were this old couple who basically look and gave us a stare. Hahahaz... And we played robbery with a colour pencil set. How lame can we be. Goodness! and its only the TWO of us. Just LIN AND ME! Hahaz... okok.. here's the best part. We were too carried away with hearing impaired club that we decided to not talk from level 4 of john little to the exit and istead communicate using sign language. Hahahahahaz... and guess what people actually look at us like as though we are really impaired. There's this indian fella who were actually staring at us signing. Hahahaz... at the escalator too. Hahahahaz... once we reached the entrance we couldn't stand it but break to laughter. Hahahaz... how can people even believe us. But seriously i think its rude to look like that. Poor thing for those who can't talk or hear, and people have to give them those stares. Even we felt uneasy when people look at us like that. Gees...

So then went to Cineleisure to have Burger King and did some serious talking. Hahaz... for some reasons the serious talking was fun. Super fun. Should have more of that la Lin. Hahaz... we talk about that issue. And till now we wonder who's wrong and who's right. And that what's her motive actually. Hmmm... owh well. Only time will tell right Lin? Okay so headed home.

Then that night went to the doctor because i just cannot tahan alaready. There's this big ulcer in my throat. And now my throat is BENGKAK. Super pain. There's like this sharp pain whenever it swollow anything. And doctor Khairul (haifa norrin don't jealous i saw him! LOL) says it will be there for 2-3 days. And now i have ulcers at my toungue too. Around 3 of them. Imagine how hard is it for me to eat. Gees... super painful! Plus my cough was another heartache. When there's cough there's running nose. Owh well it always comes in a package. So gees... i can hardly sleep that night la. The next day had fever. Super cold and feverish. Ahh.. i hate the feeling. Now my throat still hurt badly but its ok la, i'm fasting so i'm not eating anything. Just swollowing saliva. Hahaz... eh it still hurts ok.

Was suppose to go to Kampung Glam with Lin and Khai that Saturday. But i was still sick so couldn't make it. Sorry girls. For now i just ended chatting with dear girl MIERA. Super nice girl la she. Hahaz... thanks girl for everything. For listening and advicing. Just love chatting with her man. Ok can't wait for singapore Idol tonight. I love both. Johnathan and Hady. OS may the best man wins! Woo hoo! Ok... befor i leave heres replies to my dearest taggers:

dear miera: No girl, i got no frendster and you shud know why by now. Nice chatting with you. Must do it more ok hun?! Hahaz... =)

dear -fiddy-: Hey its also a perkara kecik jer tu. Hahaz.. no problems!! Next time if my driver can fetch you again i calling calling eh? Hahaz... twees!!

dear hi_far: Owh yah, since i sick you come over visit me and shave for me ahh!! Hur hur... and if the tics on you i don't mind at all ma sis!!! Twees...

dear gab: The month? Did i say that? Hahaz... its rather the month which causes my mood to be like 0 but yea the doctor also says the haze and all is the causes. Alah like ili love to say i have low immune system. Hah!! At least you don't say that Gab! I love you many many. Hahahaz...

dear ayienz: Yea man nurses rocks my stockings! Hahaz... only one of the nurse and that is you AYIEN!!! Wahaha!! =)

dear nana: Hahaz... thanks nana. Don't worry yus will still be as crazy! Twees! =)

dear Lin: Eyy dah gi doctor okay! Dush! And yes hun we'll break fast together one day ya. Love ya too! Muacks... *hugs*

dear yanti: Okay i know her confrim chop chop. Add me at MSN and i'll get back to you. My e-mail address is princess_yusliza@hotmail.com . OK?

dear ads: Hahaz... but still love YELLOW the most! So i'm not colour blind when it comes to YELLOW only! TWees! =)

dear haq89: Hey... my precense is not hat important compared to you who take so much effort in it. Taking your precious time during holidays to meet Ayie, Khaira and all. What i contribute is nothing. You rock la Haq!! Selamat berpuaser to you too!! Cheers! =)

dear saL: Heyy kak!! Selamat berpuaser to you too!! TWees! =)

dear hakim: Same to you too dearie!! Senyum2 slalu! Hahaz... =)

dear wan: Heyy yus pun nak ucapkan Selamat Berpuaser kat Wan and yus dah lamer tak DUSH wan. So nanti jumper online yus HYAK DUSH wan ok?! Twees!! :-)

dear tino0ot: Hey... you too slamat berbuker. Jaga scooter tersayangku baik-baik tau! Suruh dier puaser! Twees! =)

dear sky: Same same. Slm ramadhan to you too! Twees! =)

So till here for now. Its a long entry anyways. So enough.

the end.

when memories become my partner.

There goes another attack.

I hate to repeat this again but owh well, i wanna shout it out so bloody loud la. September is just sooo not my month and i HATE Septmber! Ahhh! Shucks all ah! *relieved* And what the heck i'm sick. Ahh... been coughing none stop. Even during the iftar meeting. I hate it la! Ahh... and as soon as i came back home from tuition just now i reach for the toilet because i threw up!! Gees, thank god i reach the toilet on time. Else, mama have to do mopping here and there. Hahaz... Its tiring to cough so much la. Especially when you cough and you have to talk so much. Like hey, i gotta teach man can yus's throat please stop the coughing at once. ISH!!! Sucks la. I'm like grasping so much for air already man. Gees... as usual mama will always go, "nak gi doctor?' Like NOOOOO!!!!! DUH!!!!! Strict NO NO man... eww! Medicines. Yucks! Yucks yucks, just yucks!! So yeah since i can bear with it no use going doctor la. I hate doctors but i love nurses! Wahahahaz.... they are like the only nice people to me when i was admitted that chinese new year's eve in SGH! Hahaz... ok enough.

i'm already done with the tests papers. Wow, now i know how hard is it to set an exam paper. Ok no test paper. Hahahaz... In less than 2 weeks they are sitting for thier final exams and i was impressed to see how panic there were just now. They were like asking me questions and lots of questions and that's precisely i can't be sick or even loose my voice because i need to help them. I'm so impressed with Shane who basically wants my e-mail address so that he can send me topics that he ain't sure of. Wow, so unlike me when i was in Sec 1! Hahaz...

Having Hi Club instructor course tommorrow and if its going to be boring, i'm not coming on friday. Confirm chop chop. LOL! Ok well here's some reply:

dear sky: I told you i'm a good girl unlike you! Which part of the sentence you don't understand? Hahaz..

dear RacHeL: Yeah man, i miss those HYPB days and i miss ya too girl! Muackz... hee... and no i'm not pretty! Its you, cute as ever. Twees! =)

dear nana: Hahaz... its ok la nana! kiter action angry jer. Hehe... twees! =)

dear saL: Hahaz... ish! Takut nyer sampai jadi kero! Ok ok, i shall tell myself not to stare so much! Thanks for reminding ya sis! Wahaha... =)

I've been crapping a lot with some people in MSN nowadays and its really fun. One who keeps saying 'I love you' to me and want to kiss me in public. Hahaz... who else if its not my chinese boyfriend Mr Yong. Then my dear chatting partner Seri who come out with this word, 'CRAPTACULAR'! Hahaz.. Yessa, as night draws near, yuSeri becomes more craptacular. Simply love that word already! Hahaz... thanks for the crazy word my dear Seri! Hahahaz... and there's this Mr Nice called Wan! Hahaz... he's the nice boy who chats crap yet sometimes we talk serious. But 95% of it was crap! Yet, i'm loving it! Hahahaz... then there's Arif also. Wahaha... alah so many interesting people la who simply cheer up my boring and bad month, September. Thanks man people. Even the dumbest question can cheer me up so see me in MSN nudge me and disturb me more alright peeps. Hahaz...

Ok cool, i don't know what else to say so i end here. Wanna chat with my crazy cousin HAIRON NAJIB which is the brother of irritating HAIFA NOORIN! But i love them the same!! Hahaz... especially when Hairon keeps buying me stuff i loike!! Wahaha... i don't love Haifa anymore now because she don't seem to bring me anymore to her dates with shrek like she used to when i was young. =( Hahaz... now i cannot ketuk her boyfriend! Wahahaz... and wanna crap with Wan also now. So bye peeps!

he's back yet you are still the one i'm missing so much.

Kini baru kusadari

selama ini kau kusayangi

andai bukan itu hakikatnya

mengapa rindu yang kurasa

mungkin tiada kufahami

tidak dapat kunafikan lagi

beban rahsia kian membakar diri

This is a verse from DIDICAZLI song DAMBAAN. And i have been staring at the lyrics for like don't-know-how-long. Scanning through it. Trying to read between the lines. I listen to the song over and over again. Yet i don't know how to express it in my own words how meaningful the lyrics is. How it brings a 1000 meanings in my life. Gees... Hahaz... goodness i just think that its a bloody nice song laa! Super nice! Thanks Kyn for sending me.

Went dancesports just now. Completed set A, B and C of Rumba just now. And they are deciding on the routine for the Malaysian Competition. Hell i can't go bcecause its the 5th day of Hari Raya and my dear granny will be at home so nah... i wouldn't even have time to practice during the fasting month. Guess i'll just prepare myself for the next NAtionals competition in Singapore. I don't really like Waltz though. But my dancepartner, Jason is so obsess with it already. Hahaz... i prefer JIVE!! Can't wait for Jive lesson. Jason will be out of town for 2 weeks i think which means i have NO partner for next dance lesson. Ah.. shucks!!! Alone alone!!! WTH?! Sabar jer...

Papa picked me up just now and then have to rush to his workplace for a while. And so i'm sorry Fiddy can't wait for you. And guess what i decided to cancel one of my tuition tommorrow to attend iftar meeting. I think its still better to go la if not i'll have to trouble Fidah with the minutes. Trouble Ias also. So ya then will leave early so that i could make it for next tuition at 4:30 which i really i can't cancel for this one. Yea anyways brother's not working tommorrow, so he's sending! Yessa!!!

Okay before i crap further i shall reply tags! Woo hoo...

dear -fiddy-: Hahaz... see at least got your pic!! Bukan macam kamu sih!! Ehh? Best kan? Then aper lagi dah tak reti2 nak visit and read and tag?! Hahahaz... Babes sorry bout just now. can't wait find where were you having training also. Ader aku ingat korang but netballers. Sabar jer... Hahaz...

dear seri: Alah seri, gimme chance ah sikit nak kembang. Once in a lifetime babe! Who else will want to praise me like that if not you?! Wahahahaz!!! Anyways, you're sweety la darl! Twees... =)

dear ads: Eyy not really laa... my favourit colour is still YELLOW... no change but now your blog colour green tau!! Or is it me colour blind?! Hahahahaz...

dear miera: Ahh... miera! It would be a perfect idea if you are a guy!! Who leads!! Wahaha... one two three a four three a four!! ceh bahh!! Wahaha... i miss dancesports sports and wellness every friday!! Do you?! Hahaha...

dear wan: Amboi!! Boleh boleh tolong!! But wait what do i get after doing all this?! Or rather Yus can give Wan this afterdoing this---> HYAK DUSH!! Hahahaz...

dear Ika: Hey hey!! KUCING in the house!!! Wahaha... no probz babes. Sorry ah itupun belated. And yah man miss those sec 1 days when we first met! And wth you thought i was Maisarah's twin?! Like huh! Hahahaz...

dear gab: Thanks ehh Gab, than father fetch! Hahaz... but actually my dad fetch me also ahh! Twees! Hahahaz... next time we can go back together gether ehh... with Fidah and LiYu!! Hee... =)

dear kyn: Ehh fatser faster ahh make the gathering! I'm sure it would be fun! Hees... can see my madu lagi! Hahahaz... Owh... my birthday. All the while i thought you were talking about yours! Sabar jer... hahaz... But i don't remember telling you, you know! Even i forgot my birthday is near. Hahahaz... how you know?! Sorry MAHA slow babe!!

Okay so people all tags replied. Thanks a bunch people i love you many many. And yes, Wan says that the place is at 73-03-18, have terawih and ends before 10!! Hahaz.. pm that is. LIKE DUH YUS!! Hahaz...

So okay i don't know what else to crap actually. I'm just dead bored. I hate holidays!! I wanna go back to school. At least i can go to bed early and yah there's just something to do laa! Hahaz... ok then since there's nothing to say i sahll take leave. The end.

Shhh...

People! i'm going to share something today. Yessa! This very day! I karaoke after so don't know how many years. Hahaz... I don't really like karaoke-ing actually. I don't know why today i saw my brother sang because i think he's kindda relieving his stress, he asked me to duet with him, i said OK! Hahaz... i think its really a good way to relieve stress ah actually. Hahaz... Shhh... don't tell people outside internet ehh i karaoke at home. Hahahaz... Okay enough!! Shhh...

So yea i just felt bored and so i decided to blog. And yes Wan needs my help and that is to make an announcement. So the only way i can help this boy is to make the announcement here. Hahaz... Ok so here's the pengumuman:

MSS is organizing Majlis Iftar on the 29th September.

All Ngee Ann Muslim Students are invited.
Starts at 4:30
End i don't know because i forget to ask Wan! Hahaz...
Maybe there's solat terawih.

So yeah! And ouh yes! Another thing i forget to ask Wan! Where is it held? Hahahaz... definately in Ngee Ann but where is it held ask him yourself la! Hahahaz...

Okay this whole week i'm like super busy. I'm only available today. Having dancesports tommorrow. Wednesday- Tuition the whole day that i can't even attend iftar meeting. Gees... now gotta trouble Fidah to the minutes! Sorry girl! Thursday to Saturday, there's HI Club instructor course from 9 am to 5pm! Whoah! That's long ins't it. Gees... Then by Sunday my one and only granny will be at my house. Yay! See... i'm such a busy woman. Hahaz...

One thing that's worrying me now. Tommorrow! Dancesports! Shit la! I'm going home alone. Have to bloody cross the dark bridge. Ahhh... bro doing his reservist so i doubt he can fetch me. Papa also have to like work late at night because of i don't know what ah. Ahhhh!!! I hate to cross over alone la. So dark! Ish!! Shit shit shit!! How how how!! Shit ass la!! Grrr!!! And i think i'm in desperate need of dance partner again!! Because my dear dance partner Jason is going back to China. And so he will miss Jive lesson and thus i have no partner for Jive lesson. Grr... so another announcement here ehh besides Wan announcement. Hahaz...

Yus needs a dancepartner for JIVE!
Anyone interested PM me in MSN or SMS me or Call me!
In anyway possible la ahh!!

Okay i'm so lame. Super lame that is. Hahaz... ahh days have been boring la!!! I wanna go back to school!! BORED BORED BORED!!! Gees... thank god there's MCC irc at MSN... Hahaz... Okay shall reply to dearest taggers now:

dear miera: Hey miera! Thanks girl for the compliment. You look good in black too! Hahaz... Lilac?What's lilac? Hahaz... ok la light purple that is. You like purple? Cool! Hahaz...

dear boy: Hey... glad you dropped by even for donno how many seconds. Hope everything doing fine at home. I will, you take care of youself too. And i'm guessing your handphone is a gone case again? Hahaz...

dear saL: Hey sis!! I miss you too dear sis!! =) Long time no see!! Lets try to meet up with Sabbie yea! Twees!!

dear LiN: Rabakz sak Lin! I say i love you means i love you la! Sabar jer! Hahaz... thanks to you too girl! Twees! =)

dear hakim: Hahaz... a'ah la kim monyet yang tu tu ahh!! Hahaz... monyet yang BERG tu! Hahaz... tak sedih la! Kalau Yus sedih kim Happy-kan jer ahh! Songe lak! Hahaz...

dear sky: Alamak ni langit sabar jer tau!! Sotong lak! Hahaz... Nie stotong cute tau! Don't play play! LOL! Huh ias, actually kan aku tak paham. Asal aku hate September because i can't wait for October?! Asal aper kener ngan October? Hmmm...

dear ozal: Hahaz... Liza nyer pimple is playing hide and seek with Ozal! So pandai pandai ah tangkap! Hahaz... Wow you tagged! Tag more la yer! Twees! =)

dear hi_far: Hahaz... go buy ah! =)

dear kyn: Eh tak oii!! Yellow is a nice colour! Super nice! Wahaha!!! Way better than pink! Yucks!! Eww... hahahaz... its ok kyn the next time we can camwhore till will drop ehh! Dgr2 ader gemelapan nyer gathering biler tu yer awak?! Hahaz... eyy your birthday coming? When? nak mintak hadiah ehh?! Hahaz...

Ok best! All tags replied. Thanks people. Appreaciate all the tags! Woo hoo! Ok i shall, i shall what ah? Hmm... i shall rot now! See you in a hundred years! LOL! =)

i HATE september!

Yessa! My title said it all. 9th September and 12th September especially. 9th September was hell! Brought me to tears and i thought that was all then 12th September was another day whereby frustration, tears and more happened. Seriously, it was really a rough and tough moment of my life ah. And even till now my mind is still whirling, headaches, worried and more. i can break down anytime i swear. I 'm beginning to miss the times whereby i can laugh at anything! Just anything. Now i tend to be more quiet. I laugh only when there's something to laugh which is BORING! I don't know if people notice but some people does. Someone close to me. I don't know what's happening to me. Honestly i have been doing a lot of thinking these few days but i am still the same Yus. Really! Gees... but these few days was really really a bad one that i don't wish to talk bout why is it so, why i felt horrible or whatever. I just can't put my feelings to words. Like as usual, since when was i ever good with words anyway?

Ok enough, lets move on. At least something cheers me up ah. My results! Okay i didn't expected that i will score. Especially for Child Development 1.2 Module. Was kindda happy with it though. But still my gpa isn't good enough though i never though i could hit 3. Must do better next time Yus. Didn't really pay attention this semester for like almost every module. Gees... must buck up next semester.

Okay so, Gemerlapan Finals. It was ok. Photo taking session goes on well! My chatting partner came. Hahaz.. with Hafizah, Ady and Fizah's brother. What the hell, i just couldn't take a proper picture with Ady! But there's this one picture which i think with fiddy then Seri, my dearest chatting partner. I like! And another with Lin... and another with topet!! I like i like. Hahahaz... Warning... i have a pimple outbreak so... I LOOK HORRIBLE IN EVERY PICTURE!! Kinder Bueno's fault. Hee... =)

Fiddy and me

Lin and Me

Topet and Me

My chatting partner, Seri Atikah and Me!!

So congrats to the winners. Congrats to HAKIM!!! Woo hoo!! And to those who didn't make it actually you guys were super power also la. People like MIN esp, ikhwan, Azam, hizamy, tina and everybody laa!! POWER habes! Hahaz... So Gemerlapan over now iftar. Hmm... i just love the MCC people la. Hahaz... firendly people that is. Can't wait for fasting month actually. Been sleeping late lately because was busy chatting with interesting people on MSN. Hahaz... definately the MCC peeps that is. Hahaz... i loike la! People like, Lin (like of course la this girl, like hakim besi said, when there's yus online there's lin. Hahaz..), Hakim besi, Hakim Berg, Ias, kyn maduku, Wan (yg saw kat bus! LOL!), Zamy and more ah! Hahaz... Funny and these people have loads of crazy things to share. I LOIKE I LOIKE! Hahaz... During Gemerlapan that day, i saw a lot of things that can just bring me to tears. A lot of people asked yet its unanswered. Whatever la, i just miss those good old times together. How i wish i can hit the rewind button and pause it at that very moment where i felt i was on cloud nine. Hahaz.. owh well, that was all the past and that it always remain as memories. Ok wow, BUMMER!

Hahaz... seriously ah i suck at words man. Just can't put down my feelings in words. Hahahaz... Having a very busy week next week. Tuition and HI Club instructor course for 3 days. Gees! BTW.. a very HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY TO MISS SITI KHAIRIAH!!!Happy Belated birthday to people celebrating thier birthday this month too that is, my dear girl NISHA, NUR FARAHANA and NUR ILI! May God bless you with good health always and may all wishes come true girls. Hahaz... actually i wanna put more pictures but i don't know why, i can't. Something is wrong with blogger i guess. Or maybe its just my computer. I don't know la. So ya, anyways i repeat i HATE September. Not in the right state of mind nowadays. Hahaz... or maybe i'm really going insane or something. Wahaha... i found someone who share the same life experience as me yesterday. Who else if its not WAN! Hahaz... Hmm... Interesting! Now its a routine for Wan to disturb Yus and Yus to disturb Wan! Wahaha!! Not bad!! And Lin, its a routine to crap in MSN without fail. Wahaha... we can really crap from 10 pm to 4 am man! Wahahahaz... i love you la lin! Thanks for every help and all the listening! Muackz...

Okay i don't know what else to blog so i shall reply my TAGGERS. I love ya guys! Tag more yea! Ok here goes nothing:

dear LiN: Eyy shuttup ehh! You taller yet i'm older than you! Suspect siket ehh!! Don't play play! Hahaz... And NOO!! Pink sux sux sux sux!! Yucks... ewww!! =) But i love AZLINA! Sheehsh...

dear Pam: Pammie,our date went well!! Hee... looking forward for more ya! Twees...

dear EHHREN: Okay hopefully you are! *hugs and kisses* =)

dear hakimBERG: A'ah la! Cantik kan? Admit la awak jgn malu-malu cat! Wahaha!!!

dear miera: Hey pretty girl, thanks i'm always cheery la! Can't you see that! The irritaiting Yus!! Hahaz... nasib tak kacau biler tengah pakaikan diyanah make up! Hahahaz... kalau tak dah macam clown diyanah... hahaz...

dear hi_far: I want my name card. Please don't be a lazy bum and not sent to my house! aper guna ader BOIFREN?! And excuse me asyik gue jer ehh tido rumah lu!! Dengar2 takder saturday sundays keper for you to slee at my house?! Hahahaz... Mau yakin jer kak!!! Wahaha!!! And i got one big problem!! I have been doing a lot of my menhdi on hand. Kaki ader sikit nyer kekok. How?.... nanti sumo oijak aku! Hahaz... nasib pengantin yang September 8 tu tak jadi. Hahaz... =)

dear tino0ot: Hahaz... tak yah eye test la! Instance sesaper visit my blog the eyesight will be perfect! Confirm chop chop nyer!! Wahaha!! Anyways you rock in gemelapan!! I loike!!! Hahaz... =)

dear boy: Hey i miss you 2 3 4!!! Ben and Jerry ajer? You don't have time for me nowadays so i demand for more!!! Like maybe fish and co!!! Hahahahaz... ok miss you la.. DUSH!!!

dear kyn: Wahai maduku!!! Kiter tak amek gamabar banyak-banyak. Sedih gue! =( Hahaz... anyways ehh i HATE pink la. It hurts my eyes a lot. I hate i hate i hate!! Hahaz... sorry ah no offence who like. Hahaz... and yessa red is not a nice colour because YELLOW is!!! Wahahaha!!! I loike!!! LOL!! =)

dear ads: Ads, sesungguhnyer my madus loves pinks and i don't! Hahaz... but i still love my madus. Lin and Kyn.. gue kangen banget same lo!! Nanti kener chat chat again ya! Twees!!! Ads, long time no hear from you! How you? Twees! =)

Okay cool, all tags replied. So keep on atgging ok people! Love you guys many many! Alright long one already. So i sahll take leave. Bye peeps! Twees! :-)

the end & i miss you.

After a few miserable days. I then decided to update my beloved blog today. Suddenly, i try not to be such a lazy bum and then type all these. Hahaz. Well okay firstly wow man, just by the previous entries, i knew that actually that they are people who were concern about me. Thanks people, i will reply to your taggies soon. Well, those few days had been hard for me. Like Aaron Chan Jun Hon my best friend would say,"LIKE TOTALLY!". Hahaz... ok crap, i miss this chap alright. He's too busy with his La'Salle stuff and wooing girls that we never have the time to meet up. KUKU nut you! Hahaz... and ok yus stop side tracking. As i was saying, those few days was the worst days of my life. It took me a whole load of courage to make wise decisions. And definately TRUST is the keyword to whatever that had happened.

I was put in such a situation whereby i felt so deeply hurt. Gees, i don't know how to say. I was never good with words. But whatever it is, i pulled myself through, be strong and try my very best to solve everything. The best friend told me, "Big girls don't cry." Yup, you are so true best friend. Thanks for being there for me all this while. I can't imagine my life without you. Thanks girl. Love ya loads. And to the best friend's boyfriend too. Danny, you've been a great help! Thanks boy.

Heartiest thanks to a dear friend called, Azlina also. Lin, yea like i say, eventually i'll get hurt and break down so no use not telling me. But whatever it is, i love you the same even if you were to tell me that night or not girl. Just thank you very much. I know you care, and thanks. Not forgetting Mr. Hakim! Thanks boy for being such a good adviser to me. I'm so glad to have met both of you in such a big school with different kinds of people. Love the both of you many many la.

It is said that in situation like this do we know who really care and concern about you. Who's really a friend and who's not. Btw to Pam too. Girl thanks for your concern. Lokking forward to meet you today and looking forward for dance today. Hur hur. After so long i'm dancing again! Woo hoo!! Okay i had enough about that i shall not talk about it anymore.

Well, i was suppose to post an entry about Gemerlapan. Hahaz... about how i make a good host! Hahaz... not really la. I suck at it still. I have no script and like Lin said don't know why i was super hyper when i interact with the audience. Hahaz... But i enjoyed myself though. I LOVE GEMERLAPAN SEMI FINALS. Congrats to the conestants who make it to the finals. DO your best ya! While those who can't, don't be dissappointed there's always next year. And you'll never know i might be the host again and then we can meet! Hahaz... ok crap! No la if you love singing and drama your journey should not end here alright? And the fact that you make it to the semis means you have the talent! =) Cheers! Don't worry Hakim Tappered, i am still a fan of 'Mengintai di tirai Kamar'. Hahahahaz... love that song laa!! POWER! And now Kyn send me this song by i forgot who's the singer but the title is dambaan. Super nice song. Thanks Kyn!! Sayang banget maduku itu! Hahahaz... alamak Chombi sorry ah kiter share eh? Ok tak awak? Hahaz... There some piccies. Aiya, we just can't take a proper picture la! Hahahaz...

There the CENDEKIAWAN cum the host minus Hakim! BEcause he's acting. And Aida Just cannot take a decent picture! I don't get her. I think pretty people are like that la! Hahaz...

I make a lot of friends in MCC!! Friendly people of course so how can i not LOVE Ngee Ann Malay Cultural Club ehh!! I loike la!! Done with doing the layout for LAYAR CENDEKIAWAN. Do visit our blog ya people.

www.cendekiawan-np.blogspot.com

And ouh yah that very day i didn't feel so short. You know why because Aida is shorter than me. Like woo hoo!! See good boy, i have someone shorter than me dearie! Hahaz... and the best part is i am taller than Azam! Hahaz.. ok fine like he say i'm with the heels. Alahh... make me feel good for a while ok per Azam! Congrats to Min and Hakim gigi besi! Hahaz... You guys rawk man! Min slapped haq!! Best sehh!! Woo hoo!!! Taufiq was so an actor la... he's so cool! Hahaz... with the fake breast. SEXY! Hahaz... Okay la overall everybody POWER la. Including the host! Hahaz... Aida and Lin was great too. Not sure if i'm going for the finals or not. Hmmm... tickets at 3 bucks people. Come down, you sure will enjoy yourself. Hahaz...

Results on friday too! Wth!!! Some scary shit la. I have the feeling i'll have to retake Child Development 1.2 so bad la. Ahhh... CRAP! The aftermath of not paying attention during lectures la. But ehh i tried la but just can't. Haish. Ok whatever. I shall not dwell over it. I rather dwell on why didn't i eat the Kinder Bueno chocolate yesterday. And now its gone. Don't know who ate it. Grr...

Okay so here's the replies to all my dearest taggers. thanks people for dropping by and tagging. Appreaciate it loads. Thanks ya!! Muacks muacks...

dear ads: You see ehh ads... Too bad you not there. Cannot take picture with shortie me. Hahahaz... no la just kidding. Its ok la we will meet up again soon ah. Twees! Don't jealousjealous la no good! Hahahaz... =)

dear fana MCC: Hey! Thanks man! Urs too! :-)

dear boy: Yea, it sure do a hectic one. For me and for you. I'm sorry for whatever have happened ya. I miss you 2 3 4! *hugs*

dear gab: Gabbie nugde me in MSN if you want pics kay.

dear miera: Hey girl thanks man! Saw the gorgeous you at Geme8! Hahaz... thanks for coming down to support Diyanah and min and me also right? Right right right? Hahahaz... Twees!

dear hasni: Linked you too girl! Thanks! :)

dear EHHREN: Ehh i just realise that you have a nice nickname. EHH REN! But you know what i still prefer your nick to be KUKU NUT! Hahaz... sooooo YOU! LIKE TOTALLY! =)

dear lyd: Huh?! Really ahh? NOt my group ker? Ouh mine is the blue one. Woo hoo!! Hahaz... ok you ar ein the prefectorial board ahh? Hmm... short term memory... Hahaha...

dear yanti: Girl, there's a lot of teacher's in Hua Yi. So what's the name girl? Hahaz... and you sure she teach in Hua Yi after New Town? Wah wedding... invite me la! Hahahaz... nah just kidding just tell me the name and i'll try to get back to you ya if i know or not. =)

dear LiNa: Hey girl thanks for being there for me girl. I should be fine by now. Thanks so much babe. Love ya many many! *Muacks*

dear seri: Hah!!! My chatting partner!!! Hahaz... miss you babe!! Biler nak merepek lagik pat MSN nie?! Hahaz... Okay see ya around alright girl. Tak care too. :-)

dear nadia: Hey Naddie!!Long time no see. Got miss me not? Hahaz... Nah just so lame things happen. Will talk about it when we see each other yea. Maybe during khai's birthday bash ok? Hur Hur... miss ya babe!

dear Pam: Awwww Pam!! I'm so touched. Love you dozens and dozens la girl. I know you guys would always be with me. Thanks girls! Love you guys la. Goodness i'm so toughed! *hugs* And will hug you more when i meet you later! DUSH! Hahahahaz!!! Miss ya!!!

dear hi_far: Thanks so much man sista! Gees... sedih gue. Hahaz... i bring my own tissue then i cry on you la. DOn't have to waste my money! Dengs. LOVE YOU kak!! CAYANG Banget deh same lo!! Oii... tido rumah aku la!! Then i do inai at ur feet. Cantek nyer. OK ok ok ok ok? =)

dear nana: Hey thanks man! You sang great too man. Hahahaz.. wish i can sing like you! Hahaz... all the best for finals yea! Twees! =)

Okay MSN was having such an irritating problem last night. I couldn't sign from like what 8pm. I got so frustrated and got to know Lin also can't log in. Which means we chatted crap on the phone till 1am last night. Because at 1am then we are able to log in to MSN. Goodness, Life's boring without MSN man. SO chatted with Kyn, Haq, Lin, Hakim tappered and i forgot who else. Owh yesh, my good boy also! Hahaz... MSN is getting fun-ner now. Ok is there even such a word. Okay whatever. With those conversation with various MCC people. Hahaz... I LOIKE!!! And i love my madu la. KYN DAN LINA!! Sayang banget deh samer LO!! Nanti we chat chat again kays! Sheeshh

Okay okay, going for dance later and most importantly meeting DEAREST PAMMIE PAM later!!! After so long! Miss her la!! We shall have a long talk later alright girl! Okay that's it for today! Cya! =)

Alhumdulilah, Gemerlapam was a success. I wish to talk more about it but my my mood level is totally 0%. I never felt hurt like this before.

I was just beginning to trust and then you break it.

I thought i knew you.

I thought you are the one.

Yet it was all a lie.

I didn't know who to trust.

Or who to believe anymore.

I felt alone, like i was being discriminated by everyone.

I lost you because you were never mine.

Always i am waiting for you to come online and say the slightest 'HI'.

Always i am waiting for your call.

Always i am waiting to see you again.

but everything was such a waste.

I fall.

I fall again.

Yet everything was a mistake.

It hurt me so bad again like it did before.
It hurt, so deep but yet it doesn't bleeds.

Everything sucks as for now. I wouldn't say anything more. I wouldn't think anymore now. So save all questions for some other useful people and time. This Yus have become so weak. So she's off. CRAP!

*you are the first and the last.*

so lost.

SICK. LOST. CONFUSED. WORRIED. SCARED. IRRITATED.

Okay so that's exactly how i'm feeling right now. There's reasons for the respective words up there. What the hell. I hate to be in this situation.

I HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!

I'm so pissed right now for don't-know-what-reason yet i somehow know what is the reason. What the hell. I'm crapping. Whatever. I love Ms Azlina and Ms Aida! At least you rock my day girls. Muackz. Bye.

:-), :-p, :-(

Okay, so people has been asking me to update. But as usual when laziness strikes nothing will happened. Bees quite busy lately. Been up with a lot of shopping, movies and more. Hahaz... how busy can i be eh? Hahaz... okay first stop, Teacher's Day 2006! Woo hoo...

Wow! Went back HUA YI SECONDARY SCHOOL early in the morning after so long. Feels great to meet my dear councillors and fellow teachers. Though i got to drag myself early in the morning and went straight to shower. Hahaz... Reached school and the concert started. It was so early la. They skip the ACES thingy because it was raining. Wth. Aik Song told me it starts at 8:30 but once i reached there its finishing. Hahaz... and DEAREST AIK SONG!!! You are the one with the masterplan ehh. To drag me up on stage. Gees... Hahahaz... but sweet of you la. Thanks. Although it was embarrassing though. Hee... i can't dance. =)

Met the teachers and how surprising Mrs Wing... oops i meant Mrs Wong my lovely english teacher and Mr Amran, the teacher i admire most actually wished me happy teacher's day too. Although i'm not yet official. Hahaha... SWEET! And my dearest SIEW NGO still rememeber her lizard! Hahaz... So proud of you. Took a picture with her and we found out a funny way to send via bluetooth. We learnt that we should not stand close to each other when sending because the bluetooth cannot detect each other's device. Hahaz... only after Mrs Tan go further i saw a 'KELLY' appearl. After confirming that the 'KELLY' is my siew ngo that picture is sent! Hahahaz... Btw that is our lovely picture!

The Mrs Kelly Tan (Siew Ngo) and YusLizard! Hahahaz...

Miss doing POA and having her lessons. Hahahaz... i so LOVE POA! Ouh yes!! Miss Mrs Ang also! Beloved POA teacher. Hahaz... okay next i went pooling with shariffah and more. Hahaz... nice to see these people after so long. Hahahaz... miss them! *hugs* There wasn't lot of people who came back this year compared to the previous years. So this are some of the 5N3 peeps who came and a picture taken with them.

Went to the councillor room, and something caught my eyes which can really bring me to tears just thinking about the memories we had a view years back. The thing is this:

Goodness!! HYPB!! My beloved Prefectorial board. I miss those times. The hard and the good times when we have to stay up all night during the intensive to finish up our task by Suneeta! Miss those times when i have to fight with VINCENT!!! The toot whom i never fails to quarell with 24/7 those days. Hahahaz... yet we still hug and shed tears on the last day of our intensive. I still miss him though now. Toots!! I love HYPB!! We took hours to finish that masterpiece okay. I wish i could bring the canvas home and display it in my room. Hahahaz....!!! <3

CONGRATULATIONS to dear ADIRATNA for coming in second in Piala Tun Perak! And also attaining another two awards which i can't remember what it is. But congrats to Dila for the award she got. Err... what was it ehh? Something something harapan right? Hahahaz.... maybe Dila have been blessed after drinking too much of Fana's EXPIRED root beer. Hahahahaz.... I love MCC la!! Friendly people and i loike!

Okay i have yet to memorise my script for tommorrow's Gemerlapan rehearsel. Kindda lazy actually. Ish! Lazy Yus!!! My boring nights have been abolished thanks to people like LIN, dear CHEE YON, Norhan, Sydi, Luqman and most important people, my dearest chatting partner; SERI ATIKAH!!! Hahaz.... Love you many many girl!! Hahaz... thanks peeps for crapping with me in the middle of the night!

Alright long entry. Enough already here are the replies to dearest taggers:

dear Pam: Hey girl! Yes yes you are so right. Great to see ya again that Thursday back to Hua Yi after so long! Muackez!! *hugs* =)

dear Ika: Oii ika jgn la caplock caplock. Bocor rahsia. Haha.... but styl;e kan birthday party kiter? Hahaz.. nie la buda2 giler ECH. Hahaz...

dear jeewangz: Hee... thanks dude! =)

dear boy: i know and i miss you! =(

dear LiNa: Yes yes!! Dah update! Hees...

dear nadia: Heyy Nad!! Ya lah! You!! Busy with ODIP only don want go out with us! Hahaz... miss you too babes! *hugs* Cya around soon yea!

dear ads: No problem. A sudden conflict in your tagboard. That's scary but hahaz... who don't know everythings a joke. So twees!!! =)

dear danny: DAN!!! How many times must i correct you? Its Malik not Malek!!!! Hahahaz... when he's free we'll go out ok? Okay FINE just the 4 of us! OKAY?!!! And excuse me ehh... who you are talking to your girl's best friend here okay. Do you even think i will not take care of her? LOL!!! =)

Okay all tags replied. And so i'm off. Not been in the right state of mind these few days. Been doing a lot of thinking and the moods swings have been atrocious! Goodness! Okay whatever i can't be bothered.

*... the eye fall in love but the heart that does the sufferings. Yet this life is just for you, have at least some concern. His return scares me as though it drifts us apart... i miss you...*