The Mixture of Feelings

Ok. I'm very pissed now. VERY. I felt quite sad too. And maybe angry too. I don't know. It isa mixture of feeling. I really hope everything is going to be fine for me. Its been like almost 6 months since it happens. I was saddened by the incident. But what can i do i have my reasons. I don't understand why people just don't seem to understand me.

Doesn't mean i laugh all the time. I smile all the time. I joke all the time. I talk crap all the time. I go disturb people all the time means i'm problem free. Doesn't mean i'm always happy. I mean i'm human i also have feelings. I feel hurt. I feel sad. I felt lost and confuse. I'm sure you guys have ever been in my situation right? Its just hard for me to confide to anyone. I don't know just who will really understand me. Sometimes even the people that you believe will understand you simply don't. That's exactly because they are not me and they can never be me and know what's my feeling like. So how worried i was, how sad i am, how presssured i feel i try my very best not to tell anyone so as i won't bother anyone but there's a limit to everything and there's moments where you just broke down. I really wanna be strong and not break down. I'm really trying my best but it fears me to think that i'm alone and i have nobody to confide in... Haiz...

I really don't know what to say. I just feel so good that i have a blog. The advantages of letting out everything since this is my blog. How i feel and all. I mean i'm not offending anyone. This is just how i feel. Sigh. Why is life so difficult? Especially when it comes to feelings. Ish! I don't want to talk about it anymore. I guess being alone is still the best! So i'm off!!~