That fear.

It's strange how ideas starts flowing when we are in weird places like, the toilet. Now that I'm sitting right in front of the screen, the brain just go blank. I am simply unable to put my thoughts to words here. This is so ridiculous.

Anyways, yes, I'm drowning myself with work right now just so I am not reminded of all the treatment I get right now. I tried my best to be realistic and see the world as full of ups and downs. But the downs keep coming whenever I'm enjoying like only 10% of the ups. I'm really sorry but I'm still trying to adapt. Yes, I will still keep on trying so that I'm able to face my future. I have always hate this part of you but I'm helpless. Pendirian seseorang tidak boleh diubah oleh sesiapa pun. Some people understand but some people don't. Well, who can understand us better if not us isn't it.

Right now, if anyone were to ask me what's my biggest fear, my answer would be, my biggest fear is having to change my existing fear. Again some people understand but most people don't. Oh Allah, please, give me all the strength to face this and my future. Please please please. I'm tired world. Good night.