why must all this have to happen?...

I'm not the type who will go obsess over a guy. To me its useless to because whenever you like that someone he will never like us in return. Eversince i gotta a blog. I have never blogged anything about guys. As in how cute a guy is, how i have a crush on this particular guy or how this guy wants me to be his girlfriend. To me it just a waste of time blogging about them. Not worth it. But today i don't know why i want to share a story and it got something to do with a guy.

There's this girl who once thinks that love is just so stupid. Love is nothing but something that really hurt most. She totally don't believe in love. Even now she still believe that true love does not exist. Maybe incidents happening around her make her believe that guys can only love a girl for only a short period of time and not forever while girls can only love only one person in her life. But she believe that not all guys are like that because if all guys are like that than her father will not exist. Her father is just way too good of a husband and father that she hopes somebody if someone were to show her what is love she would want a guy who is as good as her father.

Her family is everything to her. As she is the only daughter, she is pampered and showered with so much love from her parents and brother. Her parents have high hopes for her to enter to a poly at least and to become a teacher in future. She love her parents too much that she fears of dissappointing them. She is never good at lying and she can never lie to them. To her, she can never be blessed by lying to her own parents. Her parents forbid her to have any special relationship at her age now because it will only affect her studies. Her mum always remind her not to fall for a guy sweet words. She is always adviced to find a better half to be with. A responsible and honest one would make a good partner, said her mum.

In school she never dared to be in a relationship. Like her other friends who have boyfriends, she fear that by having one she might only break her parents trust for her. Therefore, how big a crush she had towards a guy, she never want it to be a serious one. One day she realised that she had a crush on this guy who was her classmate but then she realised that one of her best friend too had a crush on him. She remained silent untill after a few years that guy confessed to her his feelings for her for the past 4 years. She never thought it was true. It seems more of a joke to her but it was true. She then decided to confess to him her feelings towards him. Since this is the last year they will be in the same school. Like any other guy would do, he asked her to be his girlfriend but was rejected because she realised her situation she is in. She realised that she definately can't be in a relationship when she have to sit for her most important exam and most importantly she can't lie to her parents. Never would she have the heart to do it. Thus she explained to him how her situation is and so they guy respected and insist that she waits for her till she's ready.

As days goes by she realised that untill when would the guy wait for her. She realised that it will be so sellfish of her if she were to asked the guy to wait when he can go for any other girl. Hence, she was honest with the guy and told him to not wait and instead find someone else to like. She fears of huting him and so its better for her to tell him now than later. He insisted on waiting for her.

One night the guy asked her if she really want him to wait or not to wait for her. Again she explained to him of her situation and try to make him understand. To her it tough to let him go but its tougher to let him wait. It breaks her heart to break his. But she have to be honest that her priority now is studying to make her parents happy. She would sacrfice anything to make her parents happy. Thus its important for her not to be involve in a relationship yet. And she realised that she herself is not ready to be in a relationship and that she needs time. It definately breaks the guys heart to hear all this but she have no ther way. She does not want to give him more hope so she have to be honest and tell him not to wait for her as it will be a waste of time. As much as she likes him she have to say it though its hurting enough. No one can understand what is her situation is like. Not even him. The guy was terribly sad but she felt worst. She don't want other to say that she is only making use of him by asking him to wait. So she wants him to be just friends and not more than that.

She hopes that the he would find a better girl than her. She hopes that he is blessed with good health always. It hurts her to see him hurt and she hopes to see him happy always. All she hopes now is to make her parents proud. She does not know what is love. And if this is called love and that she have already fallen in love then they will surely meet and be together. Not now, not tommorrow but some other time when they know what is the true meaning of love and life. No one can understand how she feels right now. For now she is just concentrating on her studies and hope that future will awaits her with something better.

The end!